Thrill Seeking

Scott was consistent in ignoring his mother’s pleas for him to not drift too far when playing outside. He found a thrill in getting lost, taking new paths and venturing into derelict buildings.

He left home in the evening the last time he lied to her, and promised he was going to see a friend that lived a few doors down. Instead, he took several routes that he had never taken before. He came to the end of an alleyway and saw a group of men lifting several bin liners into the back of a vehicle. One of the bags fell, leaving a faint, red smudge on the ground. Scott didn’t scream, and as one of the men turned to retrieve the fallen item, he ran while trying to suppress thoughts of death. Although his panicked musing was cut short, when he felt a force hit him in the back of his head and force its way through his skull.

  1. I like your story, and I love the premise. May I offer some constructive criticism? How about making your lead only THINK that he had been seen – might add a bit more intrigue to what happens to him.

    I appreciate that writing can be very personal so please feel free to disregard (or delete) my comments as you see fit.

    Thanks for sharing your work.

    1. Good tip (although I wish I would have got the advice before posting it!). I added your advice and sorted a few other mistakes I didn’t spot earlier too.

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